Well, blogspot... sorry.

I conformed to the Tumblr world. Sorry bout it.

New blog :  http://kellyraesays.tumblr.com/

Makin' it happen. See ya's.

Oh, Joy down in My Heart

Tonight marks the one year anniversary of Boyfriend asking me to be Girlfriend.

It's only appropriate I relive the story.

After a long afternoon and evening of rehearsing with my choir on Sunday, January 24th, 2010, I met Boyfriend and a few other friends in the Upper Union for some games. It didn't last very long, and I was cranky from rehearsing all day. Boyfriend asked if I wanted to hang out more, and naturally.... DUH. Yes. So we headed to the music center. After finding my favorite practice room- the one with the beautiful Yamaha- we sat and chatted for a while, until Boyfriend slid me my favorite candy bar - Hershey's Cookies'n'Cream. I looked at him, and was overwhelmed by the sweet gesture. As I tore it open, saying something about definitely needing a "pick-me-up" that day and how sweet he was, Boyfriend stopped me and said, "Uh, isn't there something on it?" I looked, flipped up the flap, and found a half post-it reading 

                                                 "WOULD YOU BE MAH GIRL FRAHN?"

I was quicker than a Steeler tackle on Superbowl Sunday. I hugged him, somehow told him... DUH Yes Joyness I thought you'd never ask Of course i'll be your girlfriend  ECSTATIC. 

In the past 365 days, I've fallen in love with the most honest, caring, ridiculous, hilarious, crazy, confident, studious, passionate, loving, forthright, and handsome man I've ever met. At many points throughout our relationship, I've told either him or other people, "I wish every woman in the world could get the chance to date you, because they'll never know what they're missing." That sentence is consistently followed by a long pause -- a moment for me to comprehend how blessed I am to call him mine. He's my Boyfriend. And if you know him, you know that all those adjectives I used to describe him don't actually do him justice. He's just the best. (Again, an insufficient description).

I love that he sings one line of a song over and over. 

I love that he thinks I'm (sometimes) funny, and when I'm not, he still laughs. 

I love that he says exactly what he means, and means exactly what he says. 

I love that he puts up with me. 

I love that he loves his family; that he finds his parents the wisest people he knows. 

I love that I finally got a sister.

I love that he tells me I'm pretty. 
I love that he puts me in my place.

I love that he is passionate about education. 

I love that he is intelligent (even though he chooses homework over me... haha). 

I love that he is supportive. 

I love that he speaks Spanish (and gets to study in Costa Rica for 16 weeks). 

But most of all, I love that he loves Jesus. In his eyes, I see Christ's love for all people. He worships and lives out his love for His Savior so outwardly -- it's contagious. And from that stems all the other things I love about him. It's awesome.

In the good, the bad, the ugly, the times apart, the times we see too much of each other, miscommunication, being annoyed, misunderstood, or hopelessly in love... I have learned and grown so much because of him. I could't be more thankful for the opportunity to know him.


This poem makes me think of him. Especially while he's in Costa Rica. So, I'll leave you with the wonderful words of e.e. cummings: 

i carry your heart with me (i carry it in

my heart) i am never without it (anywhere

i go you go, my dear; and whatever is done

by only me is your doing, my darling)

i fear

no fate (for you are my fate,my sweet) i want

no world (for beautiful you are my world,my true)

and it's you are whatever a moon has always meant

and whatever a sun will always sing is you

here is the deepest secret nobody knows

(here is the root of the root and the bud of the bud

and the sky of the sky of a tree called life; which grows

higher than the soul can hope or mind can hide)

and this is the wonder that's keeping the stars apart

i carry your heart(i carry it in my heart) 

I love you, "my sweet." Happy 1 Year Anniversary. Go team.

and there he goes.

Boyfriend leaves for Costa Rica in 8 days For 4 months. To kill me. 

Or to be a really awesome person and get to study in another country. 

It's all relative. 

One of two things will happen in his absence:

1. I will spend all of my time either on the computer, eating, blogging, stumbling, crying, and thinking about how miserable my life is without him, watching LOST...

OR

2. I won't do all those things nearly as much as I anticipate. And I'll have a super awesome semester.

The question is... what does it say if I have the best semester ever? ... No pun intended.

With that open-ended question hanging in the air, it's apparent to me that I'm slightly a tad bit obligated to be slightly depressive frequently throughout the semester. 

Fear not, my friends. My thoughts on self-inflicted-circumstantial depression are as follows: 

DUMB.

After freeing myself of Resident Assistance duties at the end of last semester, I plan on having a wonderful time with my free-ness. And so now, FINALLY, begins the list of things to do, accomplish, or attempt whilst the love of my life is out of the country. Any and all assistance in succeeding in these things would be quite a delight.

1. Learn to knit.

2. Minimize my gourmet coffee intake to 1 latte a week. (Local coffee shops, I apologize if I single-handedly put you out of business) 

3. Scrapbook. 

4. Get all A's. 

5. Read Descartes' Meditations and Other Metaphysical Writings.

6. Write a song.

7. Watch the Hawaiian sunrise on Haleakala in Maui, take a picture, and paint that picture. 

8. Master the art of cooking pasta.

9. Listen to some major Lila Downs and Mumford&Sons. 

10. Find my long, lost camera.

Well, I'll leave it at an even 10, and add as the semester goes.

The main goal is really this:

Breathe in and out every moment of this semester, find joy in the little, insignificant happenings that I experience every day, and gain a deeper and more whole appreciation for my wunnerful, handsome, intelligent, savvy, hilarious, good, kind, and sweet Boyfriend. And pray he comes back to me in one piece, remembering how to communicate with me in English. 

I find great excitement that Boyfriend will come back with crazy awesome stories. And when he asks me how my semester was, I refuse to reply with any sort of mediocre, half-hearted, or uncertain answer. Mark my words... I'll have crazy awesome stories to share as well. 

I can't wait for you to return 107 days after you leave.

As e.e. would say, "I carry your heart (I carry it in my heart)." 

I love you, my sweet.